“When You Ask for Help – Ask and Ye Shall Receive” written by Bren Koger.
One of my favorite motivational speakers is Sean Stephenson. In this video he talks about wanting to meet the Dali Lama and how it came to pass by simply telling others about his dream.
Is there someone you’ve been dying to meet or even be in the same room with? For me it was Bono 🙂 and I got to meet him a couple of years ago.
It’s easier than you think.
The person you want to meet is only always six degrees of separation away.
and there are always people who know people who can help you, but you have to ask...
The Trick is Knowing When You Have to Ask for Help
People are more willing to help than you think. That can be important to know when you’re trying to get the resources you need to make a connection or get a job done.
Do you hate asking for help? Most people do for the following reasons…
1) Rejection: We are afraid people will say ,”No.”
2) Taking Advantage: We don’t want to bother people.
3) Pride: It might make it look like I can’t do it myself.
In a series of studies by Columbia PhD students, Francis Flynn and Vanessa Lake, participants were instructed to ask favors of people.
Participants asked to borrow a strangers’ cell phone, fill out questionnaires, and asked students to help them find the campus gym — a favor that required obliging students to walk with a participant for at least two blocks in the direction of the gym
Across these studies they found that people underestimated how likely others were to help them by as much as 100%.
Even though most people are hesitant to ask for help, what they are not realizing is how hard it is for someone to say “no.”
When you ask someone for something point blank it puts a social obligation on the person. They don’t want to look bad to themselves or others.
If you want something, let others know and ask. For most it’s awkward and embarrassing to say no.
Plus, most people take pleasure in helping others.
If you have a goal or dream of accomplishing something like Sean. Maybe it’s meeting someone you admire or maybe it’s a goal you want to check off your bucket list.
Sean advises in this video to talk about your passion. Tell people what you want. It will take a step out in vulnerability.
But you might be surprised to find that there are people who want to help you achieve your goals.
Most people want to help.
P.S. Word From the Dali Lama
In this video Sean talks about the 3 things he learned about connection from the Dali Lama.
There is so much connection in
Warm, connective ,silly grins.
Pick 5 people and give then a big grin today.
2) A sense of playfulness
Are you playing today?
You have access to wisdom.
Wisdom is really about being in touch with your intuition.
Don’t be afraid to share valuable advice with people.
Be a professional listener.
Every person comes from a different place.
Put you life on pause and listen.
It’s not an activity of being quiet while they are formulating a response.
Really put your life on pause and listen
Final Words About When You Ask for Help
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You never know if that person you are asking may unlock a much larger challenge that you may be working on… it is worth stepping out of your comfort level and taking the step to ask for help.
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